a deadly sin that keeps us fit...

i have just returned from a fairly arduous 3 mile run. yes, i know 3 miles is nothing to write home about but i get so bored running you have no idea, i find a heart busting 3 mile grunt is both rewarding and less mind numbing than its 5 or 10 mile cousins, so for now, desist with the tutting. now, i must confess i am a bonafide member of what i like to call the "fake/real runner's club". how so, i hear the cry! fake and real at the same time? well, any of you who do a bit of running know fine well that a run on a deserted beach, or down the leaf strewn country lane or through the empty park never gives the same workout as a dash around some local streets. with plenty of fellow joggers and passersby, the local route always coaxes that little extra out of the winter stiff limbs. it all stems from that age old sin of pride.....let me explain, when i am at my wheezing worst i refuse to let that balding, greek looking guy coming back from the corner deli with a quarter pound of turkey and a pack of red man know that i am about to die of a heart attack! no sir, i am robust, i am a machine, i grit the teeth, crank up the ipod and storm past him for a good twenty paces. then the heart screams in disagreement, the lungs groan with discomfort and the legs start a decline toward snail's pace. but hold up!! is that a 15 year old punk with zits and a look of slyness that is very likely accidental hanging out in front of the pizza place? by jove it is!......come on pulmonary artery, no point crying about the 13 jack and cokes last friday eh? get on with it!!......speed increases again, all bodily functions maxed out......there are little red lights flashing in front of my eyes, the oil lamp is on! the battery is flat!! i am nearly out of gas!!!......but past the skulker i go, like the wind i round the corner and like an emphysemic retired miner i grind to a shuddering halt under the cover of a dark street.
my face is a red usually reserved for well thrashed arses but the pride is intact....i have just completed 3 miles several minutes faster than ever would be possible on a more secluded thoroughfare.......and impressed not only the greek and the thief but also my own wicked little jiminy cricket......don't knock the deadly sins just yet.....some at least are keeping us fit.